The difference between appearance and reality, to answer your question, is that what you make of it. Reality is a popular concept by which many delude themselves. That's why individuality exists and people disagree, IMHO. The logical question would then be: "what is truth then if you can't determine it by reality or appearance?" I liken truth to a bright light shining through a stained glass window, and on the floor are many shades of colors. All this light is the truth, but it is being filtered through colors. It's no less the truth before the window and it is no less the truth after the window either. The same way it is with reality i.e. being filtered by one's own color (beliefs). The theory of being comes into play here as well, with "being" as the objective word. If a human is born in say, Japan, rather than Germany, that child will be vastly different...or will they? Next to language and cultural dogma, what's different? Nothing. To BE human is the goal...which of course will be covered later. What is it to BE human?? If appearance is always changing and reality is a delusion, they how do we gauge one's humanity? By their thoughts maybe?