How does religion accentuate differences and conflict in society?

I think religion accentuates differences and conflict in society between men and women.
Christian religions and many others too I think preach that the woman ought to stay home with the kids, clean the house, cook the food, create a warm loving safe home environment, be socially adept, not to mention running all the errands, paying all the bills, making and keeping all the family appointments, looking good. While the man is supposed to be the provider for the family- bring home the bacon as it were.
Many churches have this set up as the ultimate goal for men and women in society. I think that some churches do give you more attention, power, respect, and clout etc. if your family is socioeconomically well off. Many in churches do think consciously or subconsciously that God must favor your family and have blessed it mightily if you have high socioeconomic standings.
In our world today the way in which the church defines roles for men and women is not realistic, is not facilitated by society.
Men have to take the traditional woman's role of cooking, cleaning the house, taking care of/raising the kids etc. and the woman has to take on the traditional man's role of bringing home the bacon. How else are families to survive today. I think some churches look down upon this and don't really accept this role reversal. The members of the church may outwarding understand that this role reversal is neccessary for the families survival and well being but the members are still praying for the time to come soon when this role reversal will stop and men and women can get back to their traditional roles.
Most people cannot follow these roles today unless they are supported by a church organization or such which makes it monetarily possible for each family in their organization to live by these traditional roles.
Whoever has the most education and earning power in the family is going to be the one who brings home the bacon today, and the other person will be the one who takes care of the kids, house, cooking etc.
Well, actually, today in most families both parents have to work and find good ways to both take care of the family responsibilities. Often times both husband and wife work outside the home at full time jobs and go to school full and the woman still does more of the housework, childcare, and cooking? And, what if the man works full time, goes to school full time and does most of the housework, childcare, and cooking? These are ways traditional gender roles are getting reversed and bent.
In some families the man stays home, cares for the kids, cooks, cleans the house, and takes care of the bills, errands, appointments etc. and creates the warm loving safe household, while the woman brings home the bacon. What about this set up? This is certainly not the church's idea of traditional family roles being fulfilled.
In my ideal world men and woman would each do there fair share of the work, all the family work/responsibilities together equally and mutually.
Until then I guess I'll just make the best of my situation with myself taking care of home, child, cooking, errands, bill paying, appointment making and keeping and going to school part time and working part time, while my husband works full time weekdays and works on his computer business full time nights, and be happy our family is doing alright, pray things keep going well and get better, and do my best not to go through stress and tensions bitterness and resentments wanting my husband to do more of my work and not have my husband go through the same experiences wanting me to do more of his work. We can just work together to create a warm, loving, safe environment, coming from both our warm, loving, caring hearts. We both do our parts and help eachother out the best ways we can, and we have sociological discussions, work to educate ourselves sociologically, and work towards social change in good ways. I hope that churches and church members remember their love and how to work together well.
We need churches and sects and cults for this matter, to bring people together in love and work together well, celebrate or understand eachothers differences and help eachother to live the best lives we can together on this earth. Church groups can do wonderful things for eachother and the world if they keep working towards love, acceptance, understanding, and away from differences, conflicts, hatreds etc.
Please, let's go people, we're in the year 2002 for goodness sakes. Let's work together well in love.
Shaunasi