I would have to choose the role as mother because I am pretty new at it and there are new things daily that change my mind on how to be a mother.
I am influenced on a daily bases on how to be a mom. My husband is always telling me how to discipline. Also that my responsibilities are to change, feed, bath and entertain my son. To my husband, my view of being a mother should be his view of being a mother. For me, in order to keep the peace, I go along with most of his way of thinking. My mother-in-law encourages me to be the way she is by consistently telling me how to do things. He views are the same as my husbands (hence where he got it from). So I just go along with it. Second I am encouraged by books and magazines to read certain stories to my son, buy certain clothes and toys, feed him certain foods, use a particular diaper and enforce the roles society wants. TV also plays a big role in encouraging me. TV shows me what toys are considered to be the best, what TV shows and movies are appropriate, and how I should act as a mom. I begin to think if it worked for them it should work for me. Another thing that encourages me to be the way I am is the Bible. There are certain verses in the Bible on how to be a good mother, how to discipline and how to raise a child. Of course I want to do everything God says is right.
There are so many social rewards for obeying the norms of being a mother. The only reward that I can physically hold and is the greatest of them all is my son. All the others are gestures or verbal expressions that of course keep me doing what I do no matter if I like it or not. The satisfaction of my son saying mama or smiling at me makes me want to do everything possible to make him be the best person he can be. Another reward would be my husband saying I am doing a good job. The plain fact that he is happy with what I am doing and our family is getting along. It’s my mom and mother-in-law saying that I am a good mom and the satisfaction with myself that I am doing right in the eyes of God.
Some of the threats of sanctions for disobeying the norms of a mother would be a major upset in the flow of things at home, my husband and child angry with me, possible putting my son in danger, or having my husband, mother, and mother-in-law looking down on me and saying that I am a bad mother. Also the violation of to many norms could lead to my child not succeeding in society later in life. The biggest punishment of all would be to my self-esteem for letting anything bad happen because of my negligence.
This was a hard subject to write about. There are so many things that encourage me to be the way I am, that I could probably write a book. It was also hard to stay on one subject since there were so many reason for different influences. It has made me think why I do things I don't really want to do just to make someone else happy.